If you can get people to talk "off the record", you will learn SO MUCH more. For instance, when we were looking for a home, Brad would ask our realtor all kinds of questions that really? the guy probably shouldn't have answered. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't anything earth shattering. We could've just as easily looked up the info online I'm sure. It just saved us time to ask the realtor. But we ended up in the perfect place for us right now.
One night this week, we took a little family walk through the neighborhood. Our neighbor down the road happens to be a coordinator for a play therapy company. She's amazing. We started talking about Noah's last cognitive eval, the psychologist that did it, and what that lady had to say. She rolled her eyes once she realized who we'd gotten. I told her my concerns about schools and how the psychologist totally poo-pooed on my homeschool dreams. Her response? "Well, she can poo-poo all she wants to. He's your child, and you need to do what's best for him." She proceeded to give us a real glimpse as to what life would be like in our public school system with a special needs child. Not that she hates public schools or thinks the teachers are awful, because that is SO not the case. But she has first-hand experience with her own. It's just how it works in our area. If your child has special needs, be prepared to fight for them. Hard.
Add to this the fact that next year, they're taking away all teachers assistants. This means that one teacher will have a good 35+ students all on his/her own. Yeah, our state is really rockin' it with education. Don't even get me started on the downsizing of teachers and the closing of libraries.
I already knew this, which is why I was thinking of homeschooling. He would get the specialized attention he needs, presented in a way that he can understand. There are a ton of homeschool groups we could join; I'm sure many having kids with autism. Heck, they even make curriculum based on autism now. The church I go to has a huge homeschool support group for moms. I have no problem going from teacher to mommy and vice versa, depending on the circumstance. I mean, I do that now. That's just a part of parenting, I think. We're all teaching our kids to a certain extent, and you know when to be "tough mom" and when to be "soft/fun mom".
Anyway, she told us all kinds of programs to check out. She told us about financial assistance places to try. She even gave us a list of... if we'd ever find a way to afford it... private schools in the area that are geared towards kids like Noah. She gave us some inside info on the company we use and why they push certain programs. She even told me that at our very first play therapy appointment with Noah, she wanted to tell us that this particular therapy probably wasn't going to help him much... but she couldn't.
Now that she's no longer employed by us? She's just a neighbor with an opinion. :)
I walked away that night finally feeling validated. And incredibly informed. I had finally gotten an unbiased opinion on how all this works. Good things about the programs we'd considered and also the realization that these don't always work for every kid. Like they say, if you've met one kid with autism, you've met one kid with autism. None of these kids are exactly alike, just like with typically developing kids. This means that one technique may work great for one kid, while it doesn't do a thing for another.
It was just really refreshing.
The best part, though?
Noah is a favorite of the therapists.
Our neighbor told us that she thinks about us all the time.
I mentioned before how we had stopped paying for therapies, because frankly, we couldn't afford it. Turns out, everyone was sad to lose him as a client.
We finally came up with a plan to afford Noah's Occupational Therapy, which is what he needs most. He has some pretty severe sensory stuff going on, and we decided we needed to figure out something. So in lieu of birthday presents this year, we're asking family to help us pay for his therapy. And of course, they all thought it was a great idea. We'll still have a friend party so he still gets to celebrate, but we decided he needs this more than another $10 truck.
So when I called up our coordinator, she was so excited to hear from us. When she came to have me sign some papers this week, she stayed for a good 45 minutes. Just sitting and chatting in our livingroom. I swear talking to her is like talking to a girlfriend. She stayed much longer than she needed to, and she was so happy to see Noah again.
She told us that she ran into Noah's former speech therapist, and the very first thing she asked our coordinator was "How's Noah doing?"
Totally made this momma heart proud, knowing that they all loved my baby. That's the sign of a good therapist. He's not just another client to deal with. They actually care.
Happy Friday, y'all!
Have a fantastic weekend!
5 comments:
Awww- how could anyone not love him- look at that face!! I am so glad you got to talk and get some great advice. Education is such a serious and hard decision. I homeschooled the twins for K this year, and I loved getting to teach them, but it is definitely trying at times. I am still going back and forth with deciding if I can continue with it (with Reese and new baby coming) I hope so, as I know it can be tailored so much to their individual needs- which public school just can't do. Good luck with everything- I know you'll figure out the best plan for you and Noah! :)
I always try and be very honest with people when they ask me about an area, a restaurant, a school, etc.
How could anyone not love Noah, he's a sweetheart thru and thru!!!
I agree our school systems leave a LOT to be desired. We're going to be sending Audra to private school. Her brother is in a school where he goes 3 days and homeschools 2. Not sure if we'll do the same with Audra or how it will work out in the next few years.
The picture of you and Noah is a framer, I take it Brad is getting better or you had it on a timer?
In Chicago Public Schools they cap off at 20 students in a classroom with 2 aids and a teacher. That's not too bad. I really pray that this all works out. It scares me too. You need to follow your gut! I sometimes wish Rich would want to home-school but there is nooooo way. :-) Plus Henry has really benefited socially from being with other kids in a classroom setting. Noah is such a cutie!
Not only are districts all different, schools WITHIN each district are different. It's crazy. I hope you make whatever decision brings you the most peace.
Good luck with the all the decisions coming up. Parenting decisions are so hard sometimes especially when you want what's best for your kids. Noah is such a cutie.
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