Oh hi. It's me. Y'all still there?

Sorry for all the silence lately, y'all.
There's just been SO MUCH going on in my life right now. Most of it overwhelming. Some sad. Sprinkled with a little good. The last couple of weeks, I felt like I had a million deadlines, my house was a wreck, Noah's sleep is a constant battle, and I had no plans for my 30th birthday. One of those milestone birthdays, right? Yeah, I was blank on what to do.

Frankly, it all just left me in a funk. I had lost all motivation and inspiration. But I took a break and am feeling a tad better now.

***

I feel bad leaving everyone hanging with the whole OT debacle. I did finally speak to her, and she was super receptive. In fact, she was almost appreciative that I brought some of Noah's own toys for her to use. And I realized how little these therapists are actually informed about their kids (at least in this area). I also think she's fairly new to this role, and to have a non-verbal, sensory-seeking toddler just threw her off.

Anyways, it's better now.

***

I've also been hired to photograph my very first wedding. It's in less than two weeks, and I'm teetering on the line between total excitement... and fall-on-the-floor fear. I was completely up front with her about my experience (or lack thereof), so she's been fully informed. It's an amazing opportunity for me, and I'm so so honored she insisted I do her wedding. Had she wanted me because she thought I'd be cheap? Then no way. But she saw my work before she ever talked to me or looked at prices, so according to her, she was sold before she ever contacted me. Do you have any idea how awesome that made me feel?? Biggest. Compliment. EVER.

The good news is that Brad will be going with me, so I won't be totally alone. I've been spending every free moment studying and practicing. And praying. Lots and lots of praying. haha.

So while this is GREAT stuff, it's still totally overwhelming me and stressing me out. I go to bed and dream about photography and weddings. It's ridiculous.

***

I'm not sure if y'all watch much news, at least the national news. But last week, the grandson of a family friend went missing. The family is from Charlotte, but he's a grad student in Boston. His grandfather used to be our worship leader at church (and ironically, when I started going to a church closer to home, that worship leader studied music under Dr Dailey... small world, huh?).

 via

After days of searching, they finally found him in a river. The whole thing is still shrouded in mystery. It's been so heartbreaking, and although I didn't know Jonathan Dailey personally, it's such a tragic scenario, and I've just been so sad for his family. They're taking solace in the fact that he's a believer, so the promise of being with him again is there. But it's still just so awful. To read more about the case, go here.

There are a few other bits of sad news that I won't go into (nothing that personally affects me or my family though, so no worries, we're fine). But there just seems to be a lot of heartbreak going on lately.

***

Combine all of this with regular life stuff, and basically, I was in an all around funk. Anything I attempted to write (and did write) came out as whiney and blah.
So I've been keeping quiet.

However, we did manage to get ourselves to the beach for the last half of the week last week. And somehow, the funk followed us there. It wasn't ALL bad, obviously. And most of it is pretty comical, now that we look back on it. But in the moment? Yeah, it pretty much sucked there for a while. More later.

See? I'm doing it again. Just talking about being in a funk brings out the funk in my writing.

So we'll end this on a positive note.

It's finally cool enough to wear jeans!

And we're pretty excited about it.

I love my baby in Fall clothes.

Here's to a much better week.

Last week in my 20's? Think I'll spend it being happy, thankyouverymuch.

Happy Monday!

Fall-type Fun

Believe it or not, I'd never been apple-picking before last week. This was one of those outings I'd been wanting to do with Noah for a really long time. We didn't get to last year, so I was bound and determined to go this year. That's why I was so excited when we were invited to go with some friends last Friday. We went to one of my favorite farms [one you may recognize if you were around a couple of years ago :)].

A couple of things I learned about apple picking.
1. Bees love apples. Especially the ones that have fallen off the tree and are rotting on the ground.
2. Apples should ripen later in the season. Because it kind of kills the "Autumn" feeling when it's 83 degrees out.
3. All those picturesque orchard shots you see people come back with? They don't show the toddler tantrums or how hard it was to keep your kid from stepping in a swarm of bees while also getting their picture. Just fyi. :)

But we still had a great time.
If you plan on going, though, bring some insect bite cream. One little guy that came with us got a bumble bee stuck in his shirt, and the mean thing stung him three times! Yes, it is a total myth that bumble bees don't sting. They DO sting. In fact, unlike yellow jackets, they can sting multiple times. But they don't normally unless you mess with them. And obviously, getting stuck in this little boy's shirt was enough to make Mr Bumble Bee MAD.

Anyway. Happy apple pictures...

(tip: bring some wipes. I knew Noah would want a bite the second we stepped onto the orchard.)

After the kids had had enough fun with the apples, we headed on over to the petting zoo. They loved tossing the apples in for the animals to chow down on. Noah has started saying "cow", except he says it more like, "Coooooooow..." He'll also moo sometimes, but that sounds like a deep "Errrrrrr.." haha.
He said it a few times while we were there, so I was pretty thrilled he'd made the connection.

 Petting the bunny. :)

Because it was the last weekend they were going to let people pick apples (they were ripening too fast, so their picking season was almost over), the sweet ladies there gave us each an extra bag to fill. So we came home with plenty of apples!
I swear they taste 10x better than store bought. If you follow me on Pinterest, I'll go ahead and apologize now for all of the apple recipes I have been/will be pinning. ;)

Happy Monday!

life lately (and a progress update on Noah)

Can you tell we've been a bit busy lately?
Part of it is due to the temperature drop (finally) around here. It feels absolutely awesome out, so we've been taking advantage of it.

Meeting up with friends:

Going out as a family:

 (Noah behaves so well at restaurants, even nicer ones. These were taken at the Cheesecake Factory)

 Soaking up the last little bits of summer fun:

 Monkey Joe's:

 

We bought Noah an Autism Awareness shirt, mostly so that others will be a little more mindful of him. I've watched people's faces completely change once they see it. It's like something on the inside softens, and they begin to reach out and play with him. Those who aren't aware of autism will ask polite questions. Kids become selfless, handing over their toys for Noah to play with. A sweet cashier at Target runs to their break room and back just to hand Noah a box of raisins or a sticker (she remembers Noah's name every time, asks how he's doing, and talks to him the whole time we check out). It's been so refreshing to see that there is still good out there. It's as if Noah teaches people to tap into a more sensitive part of themselves that often goes ignored.

For a little guy who used to be terrified of Monkey Joe, I think this can be counted as progress. :)

 Willing Fall to hurry its little heiney up:

Guess what made a comeback into Noah's diet again this week! That's right... raw pumpkin.
The kid still loves it. Go figure.

I may be a tad bias. But oh my goodness, his cuteness just slays me sometimes.

Pumpkin face 'n all.

 Btw, baking is a GREAT sensory play activity. And cheap.

Just get your vacuum ready, set yourself up next to the sink, and let 'em at it.

I use flour, white sugar, and brown sugar for the different textures.

Once he's done, I suck it all up with the vacuum and wipe the rest right into the sink. Pretty simple. When he's older, I plan on using baking to help teach fractions and measurements (I really wish someone would've done that with me. I probably would've done better in math had I understood what the numbers actually meant).

The other reason for the silence? Well, we've been doing a lot of transitioning the last couple of weeks. Noah has officially aged out of the EI program, much to the disappointment of his coordinator (we're still keeping in touch though! I talked to her yesterday!).
He now is enrolled as part of the public school's "preschool" program, even though it's not really preschool. Noah is going to therapy every day of the week except Wednesdays. Three of those days are at the local elementary school down the road. He's enrolled in OT, Special Ed, and Speech. We've only had one session of each so far, so it remains to be seen as to how much this will benefit him. I'm sure they're all great at what they do. It just takes some time to adjust and figure Noah out. It also doesn't help that they only have 30 minutes a week to do so. But we'll see. Anything is better than nothing.

He's also still doing OT with the private company (looooove them!!) on Tuesdays. His therapist, Ms Kim, is absolutely wonderful with him. She's a mom and grandma, so she has that perfect balance of wisdom, knowing when it's time to push Noah's limits and when it's time to ease up and cuddle him. :) And he's finally stopped crying! He participates well and actually enjoys it.

 (doing his pre-OT run... it's his transition tool of choice. ha)

The other therapists are also there, working with their kids, and they're all so friendly, greeting each kid as they come in. We've introduced brush therapy with Noah this week, and he loves it. I swear I could sit and listen to Kim explain this stuff to me all day. How it affects Noah, how Noah processes the sensory input, and certain signs to look for in the next couple of weeks. Fascinating stuff.

We've been seeing some really great progress with him, and I truly believe it's his OT that's helped. His stimming has decreased so much, and he's becoming a little more verbal.
A few nights ago, I asked him if he was ready to take a bath. He responded with, "Tay ba-ba". That was his first time ever using a two word sentence. I just about invited the neighbors over for a party to celebrate. I was so so excited for him. He's also saying "bye-bye" again.
Noah also knows how to count to 10, but in the past, he hasn't enunciated the words well. It comes out as, "uh-oo-ee" for 1, 2, 3.
This week though? He began to hop around the room, counting each hop and he said both "two" and "six" perfectly! Baby steps. But steps in the right direction.

He's currently obsessed with Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes. He randomly does the motions, attempting to sing along. Even on the trampoline (please ignore our neglected, ugly garden beds. we kind of didn't bother this year.). 

(how do you like that hair??)

Because he's learning to process sensory input correctly, he's getting braver. More aware of his own body and what he's capable of. While most parents freak when their kids start going up the slide backwards or do a superman jump off the arm of the couch, I'm over here encouraging it! It's typical toddler behavior, and I'm all for it!

 A couple of months ago, sitting on a swing unassisted wouldn't have happened. He's never been able to balance himself and wanted to lean back on me for support. Now? No help needed.

Noah's making lots of progress, and it's so exciting to watch. I love seeing him learn and getting to watch him make big steps firsthand.

Anyway, sorry for the novel. Just wanted to get this stuff written down before I forget. I love blogging, but frankly, sitting at a computer just isn't as enticing as getting outside and enjoying the awesome weather with my family. :)

Hope you're having an amazing week!

***

I also have a few new posts over at the Poop Whisperer. Check them out if you want!
Why You Gain Weight After Working Out
Pumpkin Spice Latte (vegan friendly option)

friends are great therapy

(Brad brought home a huge cardboard box for Noah. He's not the only one having some fun with it)

Last Tuesday evening, my friend Kelly and her fiance (also named Brad) came over for dinner. It's been a while since we've all gotten together, so it was fun catching up. Her fiance is a great guy; very loveable. Don't believe me? Just ask Noah.

Noah is a social little booger. He has no problem being friendly with strangers, as long as we're right there with him. We just can't hand him over to them (poor, poor Santa...). But something was different this time. Noah immediately loved him. He followed him everywhere, crawled up in his lap, and wanted to do whatever it was Brad was doing.

When we sat down to dinner, Noah had already eaten. He saw us, gave one long look at Brad, then crawled into the chair next to him and attempted to eat some of our pasta. I fixed a plate for him, knowing full well that he wasn't actually going to eat any of it, and gave him a fork. He proceeded to pretend-eat, keeping a close eye on Brad, making sure he was doing it exactly the way he did.

He and Brad became total best buds.

I may have to hire him as Noah's new therapist.

I don't know what happened that night, but something inside of Noah's head just "clicked". All of a sudden, he's mimicking us. He's doing normal toddler things, like eating off of a fork with no issues, playing with toys appropriately (instead of hitting 2 puzzle pieces together like cymbals, he actually does the puzzle and gets it completely right), and tries to mimick words.  He responds if I ask him "more?" by signing. On his own, completely unprompted, he signed "all through" the other night. Things I've been working with him on since he was tiny are finally showing. If he's not verbally communicating, he will grab our hands and lead us to whatever it is he's trying to communicate he wants. For example, yesterday I went to get our tire patched (darn those sloppy roofers). Noah was trying to figure out how to tell me he was ready to leave. So he found the door, then grabbed my hand and led me to it. When I explained we couldn't leave yet, he grabbed my hand and put it on the actual doorknob in case I wasn't understanding what he wanted. He's bringing me "cool" things he finds to show me, usually sticks. :)

And this leads me to my current predicament. I can't decide at the moment what the right move is here, so I thought I'd ask my internet buds.

We're on the 2nd week of doing CBRS (which is basically just "learning by playing"). In fact, because of the holiday, we've really only had two 45-minute sessions. The first one, Noah spent half the time ignoring her. The therapist is so sweet and is great at what she does. Thing is? She's not doing anything I'm not already doing. And half the time, if Noah isn't interested in what she has to offer, I'm making suggestions (don't worry, I'm not being obnoxious... just suggesting what he might respond well to) and every one of my suggestions works. We played with his train set the other day, and she did a lot of, "Can you play with the train?? Look, here's the train. Say 'choo-choo!'" I'm totally not trying to be condescending. Honestly. If we weren't paying her, I'd have her keep coming just to hang out with her. She's awesome as a person, and I know she's good at what she does. I'm just not convinced that what she's doing is right for Noah. 
Just out of curiosity, I asked her if there was a timeline for him... like one of those, "we'd like to see him saying 10 more words in 3 months. If not, we'll reevaluate..." type things. Her response was no. She said that every child is different, and she'll be with him until he turns three. So really, there's no actual goal. And at age three, he'll be in the school system where all of this will suddenly be free. Am I wrong to think this is odd? The reason we got referred by the pediatrician was because he wasn't following their developmental timeline. So wouldn't it make sense for there to be sort of a "goal" timeline? Obviously, one within reason. But a goal, nonetheless. If not, what are we doing?


Am I jumping the gun? Should we continue? Or am I just throwing away money, since Noah is obviously figuring things out on his own terms? It's not totally unaffordable (in fact, they gave us a miracle rate), but it's still a big chunk of change that we could use. And since she's doing everything I've always done with him, I'm wondering... is it worth it?


One of Brad's (my Brad) coworkers has a little boy who was a late-talker. She explained that one day, it was like everything just clicked. And that's how it seems to have happened with Noah. While he's not spouting out complete sentences yet, he's definitely made some progress. Like overnight, night-and-day progress. Something in his brain has "clicked".

I don't know. I want to do what's right for Noah. What do you think? Stay with it and see what happens? Bail now before we spend more (much needed) money and continue my own sort of "mom therapy"? Explore other options?


Aaaand... GO.
 

the obligatory Thanksgiving recap

 
We're notorious for jam-packing our holidays. While I'm incredibly blessed to have the majority of our families living within 30 minutes of us, it's difficult trying to fit everyone in. When we got married, Brad and I resolved not to stress ourselves with all the running around, attempting to see every family member on that exact day. Because really, it's impossible to do, especially with a toddler. Ultimately, we'd end up promising to be somewhere, only to either bail or show up incredibly cranky. Nobody wants that.

Before we were married, we'd spend Thanksgiving lunch at my grandparents with my dad's side of the fam, followed by decorating their tree. After lunch, we'd rush over to his parents and try to eat enough to keep from disappointing his mom, yet not too much to where we'd be sick. After that, we'd head on over to my other grandmother's house for dinner with my mom and family, where we proceeded to decorate her tree.
Again, I was so incredibly blessed to have that much family nearby, but really, at some point, something had to give. We'd always end the day feeling gross and exhausted.

So Thanksgiving has changed for us a tad, and it's been nice. We still fit family in, but it's more on our terms now. After all, we're the ones with the baby, so everyone is more than welcome to oblige.

For lunch, we still head to my grandparents' on my dad's side. It's where the most family members gather. Plus, the food is out of this world. All that stuff Paula Deen got famous for? It originated in the kitchens of Southern matriarchs.

We all gather 'round, hold hands, and my dad says the blessing.

Noah's still finicky about trying new food, so he stuck to the more traditional PB&J and sliced apple lunch. He also was hungry before everyone else was ready to eat. He looked awfully tiny sitting at that big table all alone.

 ("Here, Dad. You need to drink more water...")

 

We got in some quality cousin playtime.

 

(I promise you, those eyes are completely unedited. So pretty)

And of course, guess where Noah wanted to go.

He literally grabbed our hands and led us to the door.

Pretty sure he spent a good half hour out there.

I met up with some friends yesterday (Lori and Jess) and we were discussing how the men in our lives seem to be totally incapable of taking a flattering picture of us. This is half the reason why I'm hardly ever shown on this blog. Also, I'm terrible at the whole stick-your-arm-out-and-smile thing. I always look deep in thought in those pictures. Anyway, all this to say... this is the best shot of me from the whole day.

Yeah.

For dinner, we had Brad's family over. I usually do the cooking, which of course I absolutely love. It's the one time of the year that Brad lets me go nuts and make whatever I want for everyone. See, I love to feed people. It makes me happy. And his family seems to like my food. I sent several plates home with people, so I'll take that as a good sign.
We also had our childhood buddy and his new girlfriend over for dinner. He's practically family anyway, and in my book? The more, the merrier.

Once bellies were full, the party made its way to the back yard where family played football in the dark.

 (don't worry, my niece does have good fashion sense. she borrowed some of B's clothes to play in)

It was pretty cold, but I thought Noah would love going out back and running around with everyone. So Brad and I bundled him up and took him out. We tried to keep him out of the middle of the action. Unfortunately, he really loves football. My sister-in-law's boyfriend went to catch a pass, completely oblivious to the toddler behind him. Not only that, but it was the other team's job to tackle him. Poor little Noah didn't stand a chance.
All of a sudden, I felt like I was in one of those dreams where everything is moving in slow motion, and no matter how fast you try to move, you just can't get there in time. It was one of those moments. Brad yelled for everyone to stop, but it was too late. I watched our little guy get knocked over and take several tumbles before coming to a stop.
Thankfully, Brad swooped in and grabbed him before he got stepped on. He wasn't hurt, but ohmygoodness was he scared. Little man was shaking and crying and totally bewildered as to what had just happened.
And the poor guy that knocked him over. It was his first time meeting us. We assured him Noah was just fine, after he apologized over and over. And then, in true Kemper style, everyone teased him mercilessly.

Other than Noah being totally traumatized, Thanksgiving went off without a hitch. Lots of good food, plenty of laughs, and most of all, being thankful we were together.

And now....

It's officially Christmas Time!!